Pushes and Leg Pumps

My daughter loves our swing set.

I often wonder how long she would sit there swinging back and forth, smiling with every push, giggling here and there?

Today she surprised me as she refused my pushes and tried to imitate pumping her legs like her older sisters. She just couldn’t get the rhythm right, though. She was making the swing jiggle a little, but she was not swinging. I admired her commitment, but I could see a meltdown about to erupt as her frustration increased.

I decided to help her out with a little push when she wasn’t looking.

•••

It can be a tough call at times, determining when to give a little push and when to let someone fail, and I’m not just talking about parenting anymore. There is much to be said for both, but there really needs to be balance.

I am so thankful to be surrounded by the positive encouragement of others that give me a little needed push to help me through a project. Sometimes that is all I need and I’m back on track, full steam ahead.

There are other times that I resist the advice and aid of others. I just want to try it on my own, risking a failed attempt if needed because there is no greater feeling than that of accomplishment. Sometimes I succeed. Most often I fail, but those failed attempts are such glorious glimpses of what soon will be if I keep trying.

It’s important to know that not all pushes in life are helpful, and going it alone isn’t always bad. The hard part, excuse me, the important part is knowing when to accept and when to pass up assistance.

I’d be a fool to refuse all pushes.

I’d never grow, however,  if I didn’t try pumping my legs on my own regularly too.

Kelly Croy is an inspirational speaker and artist. Please visit his website to book Kelly for your next event. www.kellycroy.com or call  1-800-831-4825  or email at info@kellycroy.com Kelly’s  presentations have entertained and amazed audiences across the nation including corporations, schools, churches, conferences, and numerous other venues where people come together to be entertained and improve their lives. Please consider booking Kelly for your next event.

Do You Make This Mistake With Your Goals?

Do you only drive halfway to work, leave the car on the road, and walk the remainder of the way? Do you only pull your pants halfway up and decide that’s good enough?

If you are like me and millions of other Americans, you set some goals and resolutions for the year back in January. Well, it’s time for your six month check up. Yep, we’ve made it halfway. You haven’t stopped have you? Have you accomplished any of your goals? Are you closer to finishing them since January or are you farther away? Regardless of how you answer, you have lots of time to achieve some incredible accomplishments, and I’m here to help.

First, I’m hoping you set some goals.  I know people that argue the point, but I favor the wise saying, “If you fail to plan, you plan to fail.”  And that’s how I look at resolutions and goals; they are a plan for your year. Let’s get our goals out in front of us and take a look at the person we want to become. Wiser? Healthier? Wealthier? The better-you isn’t that far away.

I wrote my goals down in my journal, so it’s easy for me to review them now.  If you didn’t write them down, well now is a great time to do it.  You can even set new ones. The year isn’t only half over, it also only half started too, depending on how you look at it. I have read about numerous studies showing the benefits of keeping written goals. I believe them because it has worked for me!

For the remaining six months we will need to review these goals more often. A minimum review would be monthly. (How can you tell if you’re making progress if there is no way to measure it? You can’t pull out your list next December 31 and see if you got lucky. Some people review them daily. Why? Because they really want results! Do you?)

Perhaps you started strong on your goals and ran out of interest or energy.  That’s why we need a plan.  Now is a great time to make adjustments and set new goals. Take a look at the next six months and plan accordingly.  Challenge yourself, but incrementally so you are rewarded when accomplishing chunks of your goals. Figure out who can help you and the resources you already have at your disposal. Break your goal down into chunks that are easier accomplished.

Why did you make these resolutions? Now is great time to recommit and invest in how you will feel accomplishing these goals and making progress toward them.  Get your emotions involved. Get fired up!

Don’t be a quitter! Last January I heard a radio commercial advertising for people to come to a bar and break their resolutions. Sad. Stick to it. When the ball drops next year, put a smug grin on your face knowing you did something with the past 365 days that wasn’t easy and made you a better person.

My super-quick plan for helping you “win” the second half of this year:

1) Get a journal! Not only do I want you to write down your goals, start dating it with actions you have actually taken towards them. This will also be where you create your plan. (e.g. July 7, 2010 ‘Today I ran around the block. Signed up for a 5k in October. Better get busy!”)

2) Have an accountability partner. Share your goals and dreams with others. You will be surprised who wants to help you and encourage you. It doesn’t have to be formal. Send them a text or post it on Facebook. (e.g. I wrote 400 words today of my novel. Keep me honest!)

3) Review your goals regularly and remind yourself why you want this! (Nuff’ said.)

I really want you to succeed. Leave a comment below with your goal and what you doing about it.  Good luck.

Kelly Croy is an inspirational speaker, author, and artist. Please visit his website to book Kelly for your next event. www.kellycroy.com or call  1-800-831-4825  or email at info@kellycroy.com Kelly’s  presentations have entertained and amazed audiences across the nation including corporations, schools, churches, conferences, and numerous other venues where people come together to be entertained and improve their lives. Please consider booking Kelly for your next event.

Mentor: Get one. Be one.

I just finished a mentoring session tonight and as always, I feel as if I learned more than I advised. The old adage holds true, “To teach is to learn twice.”  Mentoring is an ancient practice, and one I hope to encourage.

Some businesses and schools offer mentoring programs that pair newcomers or those who are struggling, with a more experienced individual. The programs certainly have their success, but there is something less than inspiring when the relationship is compulsory, or highly recommended. An ideal mentoring relationship occurs when one who truly aspires for advancement is matched with one who is willing and able to provide instruction and direction.

You may think you don’t need a mentor, after all, you made it this far through hard work and discipline. Look how far you’ve come on your own! Who needs a mentor?

In this age of easy access to information, I fear we devalue experience, style, hindsight, and ‘exceptions to the rule’ that only a mentor can provide. A good mentor can provide you with feedback, instruction, and secrets, if you will, that would normally take you years to learn on your own, and forfeit your suffering through quite a few failures too. (Don’t worry. You’ll still have your share of both, but the mentor will allow you to take the art to a new level.) Sure, I can purchase books and DVDs on Wing Chun and learn a few moves that seemingly mirror those of Robert Downey Jr.’s fight scenes, but the real art of this ancient martial art cannot be summoned from independent learning. The same is true of all arts. Enter the mentor.

Mentoring in this age of social networking may occur to a degree through blog posts, articles, wikis, tweets, status updates, Skype video calls, websites, online videos, and emails, and that is a great start, but I am encouraging something more; a common time where a master unveils his secrets to a student privately. Two people agreeing to set aside an hour each week or so, to the advancement of the craft and the individual.

There is an unspoken covenant between the mentor and the student. I am going to share with you all that I know. You will apply it, add to it, and pass it on to someone else. The mentor doesn’t hold back.  The student doesn’t shirk.

Two common problems occur today with mentoring.  The first is that the student is embarrassed to admit what he does not know, and the second is that the mentor is embarrassed to admit what he does not know. (It seems everyone knows everything these days.)  This must be overcome.  Again: An ideal mentoring relationship occurs when one who truly aspires for advancement is matched with one who is willing and able to provide instruction and direction.

I am where I am today due to many mentors in my life.  As a teacher, a coach, a father, a friend, an artist, a speaker, and a businessman, I now have opportunities to mentor others. I do not take them lightly. I do not think of myself a master of anything, and quite frankly the term mentor makes me feel old, but there is so much to be gained through mentoring. For me, I still have my mentors that I consult with, and I have my students that I meet with too.  Successful mentoring is to not only be one, but to have one as well.

• How do you get a mentor?  You find someone’s work you admire, and you ask.  Sound easy? Well, most people never ask.

• How do you become a mentor? Do great work. Wait for someone to ask. When they do… say, “yes.”

Kelly Croy is an inspirational speaker, author, and artist. Please visit his website to book Kelly for your next event. www.kellycroy.com or call  1-800-831-4825  or email at info@kellycroy.com Kelly’s  presentations have entertained and amazed audiences across the nation including corporations, schools, churches, conferences, and numerous other venues where people come together to be entertained and improve their lives. Please consider booking Kelly for your next event.

Why I’m on Twitter and You Should Be Too!

Social media like Facebook and Twitter are incredible tools that everyone should be using. I particularly value  social media’s ability to provide me genuine access to ‘big name’ experts in the fields I am most interested.  Time and time again social media has offered me access and advantages that I could not find anywhere else.

Facebook vs. Twitter? Facebook is for keeping in touch with people you know, and Twitter is for initiating contact with people you would like to know better. While Facebook is undoubtedly the most popular social media site, I find Twitter increasingly more useful.  I use Facebook for primarily keeping in touch with my family members living around the country, friends, college buddies, and acquaintances that I would generally only contact infrequently.

What is Twitter? The best description for Twitter I can provide is that it is Facebook stripped of everything but the status box, and even it only permits 140 characters.  All you provide is your status.  I “follow” the people I want to know better.  I read their status updates. It reminds me of skimming through a newspaper looking at only headlines.  If I want to learn more, there is often a link to a photo, news story, or a website. It is amazing the amount of valuable information I can access within seconds. And it truly is useful. It is as if I designed a paper to have only the articles I want to read. Twitter has become my first source of  news in the morning.

Avoid the Numbers Game! Like Facebook, Twitter keeps track of who you follow and how many people follow you.  It is indeed vain to spend your time building a long list of followers.  I use Twitter as a business networking tool and was at first very interested in building a long list of followers.  Don’t.  After using Twitter for over a year I can assure you who you follow is more important than who follows you.  If you still really want that follow list to grow, provide great content in your tweets.  (Yep, that’s what your status updates are called.) The only true way to grow a long list of followers is to follow a lot of people. I think this dilutes the value of the headlines (tweets) I receive. As Seth Godin reminds us, it is more important to have a few followers interested in what you are doing and reading your posts, than a large number that could care less who you are.

My success with well known experts? As outlined below, I have had great success making contact with celebrities and experts of various fields. First, I was an early adopter.  I jumped on this social network tool early and learned how to use it, even before many so-called experts knew how to use it best.  Advantage, me!  Second, I ask. Much of my success in life is owed to this simple yet powerful secret; ask for what you want.  I use Twitter to ask questions and request materials. It works. Third, I think some of returned interest has to do with the fact that I work within a unique industry myself.  While I am not famous, being a professional speaker and performance chalk artist interests others enough to respond. They see my profile pic, and description accompanying my request, and interest builds. (Even if for only a short time.)  And I still think there is something unique about a man named Kelly.  My name has served me well. More importantly, however, is the character of those you follow.  Follow classy people who are givers, and you will most likely get a response.  I follow some amazingly generous people.

Is their really a return on your investment of time using social media? Yes. Return on Investment (ROI) is the current buzz word among business executives, and it is an important factor to consider when adopting social media use, because the truth is, improper use of social media can be a devourer of our time. Like everything in life from trashy novels, television, Facebook, to video games, you need to moderate your time and weigh your gains against your investments. I have found Twitter to be the fastest, least time consuming social network available, and I use it to update my status on other networks (e.g. Facebook).  I use my iPhone, check the Tweets, post a tweet, all from the grocery line. As a speaker and performance artist I have been booked for many presentations through my contact through Twitter and Facebook. I have been able to build my brand and my credibility.  Social media has certainly brought greater attention to my art and writing as my posts gets forwarded.  (When someone likes what you post, they repost it to their followers, and then they repost, etc.  It’s called ReTweeting (RT). Without a doubt however, the greatest return on my investment of time is the information I glean from other professionals and the contacts I have made.

Prove it! Social media has been very good to me in granting me access experts in various fields in which I have interest. This is a big deal. First of all, I have received personalized, valuable insight from the top names in their field. Michael Hyatt, the CEO of Nelson Publishing has provided me with personal advice on tools to use within my speaking and writing field. The Robert D. Smith, talent manager for internationally acclaimed speaker, writer, and humorist, spoke with me on the phone  for over an hour following a Tweet and provided me with an evaluation of my website and incredible advice to further my career as a writer and speaker. David Pogue, technology writer for the New York Times, and one of the top technology advisors on the planet has not only provided me with personal advice, he has mentioned me and used my ideas in two published articles in the New York Times, and includes me as a contributor in his book, The World According to Twitter. David even asked me for parenting advice as his son, also named Kelly, is dealing with his name as a teenager. I could list many, many more examples, but most recent access granted was with David Blaine the illusionist and performance artist allowing me to ask him a few questions and receiving a signed, personalized, art print from his amazing underwater feat. Incredible! Finally, I have also used Twitter as an incredible customer service relationship with businesses. After attempting to go through a business’s telephone customer service labyrinth, waiting, and waiting, being placed on hold, transferred and transferred, eating up the precious time of my day, and then finally being told that they tried their best and found no resolution I decided to take my request to Twitter.  Why should my customer service problem be private and time consuming?  Why can’t I just drop my request on Twitter and have them contact me with a solution. And that’s exactly what I did. It has worked wonderfully with all three of my polite, but carefully worded requests; I guess businesses just don’t like being tagged on Twitter with poor customer service. The real kicker? The results arrived much more swiftly and with a sincere personal touch as if someone actually cared about my request.

I don’t share these amazing encounters with you to impress you, but rather to encourage you to empower yourself with this powerful equalizer that is social media.  Where else could I gain access to such individuals? The opportunities and rewards are endless.  How you decide to use it is up to you. Besides, it’s fun. I have made some great friends and I enjoy reading the posts.

Give it a try.

Consider following me on Twitter: www.twitter.com/kellycroy

Kelly Croy is an inspirational speaker, author, and artist.

Please visit our website to book Kelly for your next event. www.kellycroy.com info@kellycroy.com 1-800-831-4825

Kelly’s  presentations have entertained and amazed audiences across the nation including corporations, schools, churches, conferences, and numerous other venues where people come together to be entertained and improve their lives. Please consider booking Kelly for your next event.

You Don’t Need a Title to Lead

This Memorial Day weekend my family and I joined millions of Americans across the nation in honoring the brave men and women who have sacrificed so much for our freedom and protection. The living rooms, televisions, newspapers, books, and family histories across America are full of stories about “the ordinary men and women” that answered the call to lead and performed phenomenal acts of valor and heroism. Ninety-nine times out of a hundred these heroes held no real rank or position, but simply did what needed to be done, and afterward, they sought no recognition, and even more often, they spoke little of their amazing contributions to history.

Leaders don’t need titles or positions of authority.  The labels of captain, president, chairperson, or spokesman are only as good as the character of the person to whom they are attached.  Genuine leaders are the ones who stand up for what’s right when everyone else remains seated, they speak up when everyone else remains silent, and they answer the call to lead regardless of the situation or outcome to themselves.

In an age that so desperately needs great leaders, it is sad to find so few, and even sadder to find a lack of leadership instruction and mentoring en masse.  That is why holidays like Memorial Day are so important. What a great time to recognize the leaders who paved our way, and use their lives to inspire future generations of leaders. Break out those photo albums an share the stories of the leaders within your family to your children and pass the stories down. Let each day be a memorial day to great men and women, and a call for future generations to lead.

Honor Through Remembrance.

Thank you to all who have served, are serving, and those considering future service.

Kelly Croy is an inspirational speaker, author, and artist.

Please visit our website to book Kelly for your next event. www.kellycroy.com info@kellycroy.com 1-800-831-4825

Kelly’s  presentations have entertained and amazed audiences across the nation including corporations, schools, churches, conferences, and numerous other venues where people come together to be entertained and improve their lives. Please consider booking Kelly for your next event.

What Everybody Ought to Know About Bullying


It’s wasn’t easy for me growing up with what many considered a girl’s name.  A boy named ‘Kelly” was often a regular target for bullies.  I wouldn’t change my name for the world though. It’s not only my identity, it has helped me become the person I am today.  My name forced me to stand up to the mean-spirited and helped forge a much-needed self-confidence at an early age.

While I’m what many consider a ‘big guy’ today, that wasn’t always the case. I was one of the smallest boys in my class until my eighth grade year.  I was shy too.  My first interests weren’t sports but rather art and writing. The combination of all of these qualities that made me, well ‘me’ often made me different, out of place, and teased.  I was not, however, a victim. I guess somewhere deep within my genetic code, my Irish DNA stepped up and helped me confront what I knew was wrong. When I found out that my name ‘Kelly’ was Irish for ‘warrior’ that sealed the deal. When others were being teased I would get involved.

I drank my milk, worked out with the football team, and graduated a ‘big guy’ with big plans. I was always on the lookout for people unable to speak up to bullies themselves. I understand where they’re coming from, because it isn’t easy.  As a teacher there is nothing that I enjoy more than correcting a bully, and helping the recipient of the abuse feel more confident and loved.  Even out in public, far from home, I walk into situations where someone is being victimized.  It’s just my nature. I’m still the Eagle Scout trying to be helpful, trying to make a difference.

Oddly, the bullying never ended.  It didn’t matter how old I was, where I was, how big I became, or what accomplishments I had achieved.  There has been a bully at each stage in my life.  Perhaps others don’t call them that, but I do.  Anyone that finds enjoyment at the suffering of another is a bully. (Here is a great webpage that highlights warning signs and characteristics of the typical bully.) It may be a coworker, a neighbor, or even that mean clerk in the checkout line. Regardless, there is no shortage to negative thinking, mean-spiritited bullies.  I have even read about cyber-bullying that uses texting, blogs, and social networks to harass and victimize. (Many states are considering more laws about bullying and greater punishments.)

So what do you do with a bully?  How do get on with your life when a bully steps into it?

Here’s what I want you to know about bullying: Click to Read More

 

Start Something You Can Be Proud Of

When my wife and I purchased our first home, we were blessed to have some friends help us move in.  I remember two of my buddies were maneuvering a couch through the front door. I was carrying a box of my wife’s dishes, and a dear friend was carrying a box of my books.  One of the books fell out  and landed on the sidewalk. As a result, twenty men’s lives were forever changed.

The book was titled Starting and Running a Profitable Investment Club. It had been on my shelf for years.  It was something I had always wanted to start, but just didn’t have the gumption.  My friend encouraged me to pursue it, and together we called all of our friends. Now, twelve years later I can tell you with all sincerity it was one of the smartest and most worthwhile decisions I have ever made.

Our initial thought was of course that the investment club would make us wealthy beyond imagination, and in some ways it has. The real treasures  have been the friendships formed and strengthened, the confidence we gained to pursue new ventures, the fellowship at each meeting, providing each person with a genuine purpose, and the ability to serve others and our community.  We have gained knowledge of finances, networked with other people and organizations, started businesses and charities, and we have strengthened leadership skills. The benefits of a club are truly too numerous to name. (Did I mention it’s also just plain fun?)

You need to start a club. It’s easier than you think, and you will be so happy you did.

Your club might be an investment club like ours, or perhaps you have always wanted to be in a book club, a Bible study group, or maybe you like to work out and you want to glean ideas off of other athletes.  Regardless of your interests, there are so many people out there that just want to be part of something and are waiting for an invitation. Your club needs a purpose, but it can truly be about anything! Having somewhere to go each month, genuine interaction with others, and experiencing something new is what clubs are all about.

I remember hearing stories about my dad rounding up a bunch of high school students that were cut from the high school basketball team. Dad was their age and decided it would be best if they just started their own team.  (Seriously, this really happened.)  They called themselves the Marysville Giants.  Well, dad’s team scrimmaged all of the basketball teams in the league. This did wonders for the boys on the team.  They had fun, improved their game, and really boosted their confidence.  The high school teams they played improved as well from the scrimmages.  It was a win-win for everyone.  My brother and I thought my dad’s stories were more fantasy than fact, until an elderly man produced a worn picture  of  The Marysville Giants at my father’s funeral, and with a tear in his eye, named every boy on the team, including himself.  More than fifty years later, this man honored my father for having started a club basketball team.  It changed his life, he told us.

Clubs change lives.

Dad’s team didn’t go on to win any trophies, or championships that I know about, but it gave each member a purpose and truly helped them through life.  Dad’s team I suppose was nothing more than a club, but don’t tell the veterans on that team.  To them it was real and it was war!

Whenever I was down in the dumps as a kid growing up because I didn’t make a team, or didn’t get invited to a party or something, dad would look at me and say, “Well, …start your own!”  And I did.

Two of my proudest accomplishments in life outside of my family and business have been the clubs I helped start. Once you a start a club it will take on a life of  its own. Make a list of like-minded people you think might be interested. Pick a date on the calendar and invite them over.  Have some snacks. Explain what it is you want to do and why.  All the resources you need can easily be found in the library or on the internet.  But remember, it wasn’t that book that fell out of the box twelve years ago that started the club; it was action.

Kelly is an inspirational speaker, author, and artist. Please visit our website to book Kelly for your next event. www.kellycroy.com info@kellycroy.com 1-800-831-4825

Kelly Croy is a chalk artist and professional speaker. His presentations have entertained and amazed audiences across the nation including corporations, schools, churches, conferences, and numerous other venues where people come together to be entertained and improve their lives. Please consider booking Kelly for your next event.

Follow Your Dreams! Former Student on American Idol

Crystal Bowersox was a student of mine in seventh grade.  Yes, she was that talented then and our teaching staff often told her how successful she would become!  I remember her  singing and playing her guitar at our annual middle school talent show.  She sang a song by Jewel.  To be honest, I am not surprised that Crystal is going to Hollywood on American Idol, but I certainly am pleased.  She is amazing.  I hope she wins it! Regardless, Crystal is a winner because she followed her dreams.  Please join me in supporting Crystal on American Idol.

Kelly is an inspirational speaker, author, and artist. Please visit our website to book Kelly for your next event. www.kellycroy.com info@kellycroy.com 1-800-831-4825

Kelly Croy is a chalk artist and professional speaker. His presentations have entertained and amazed audiences across the nation including corporations, schools, churches, conferences, and numerous other venues where people come together to be entertained and improve their lives. Please consider booking Kelly for your next event.