Download my free “What Everyone Needs to Know About Bullying” ebook by click here:
Here is a short sample:
Here’s what I want you to know about bullying:
1) It’s wrong and it isn’t just a part of growing up. While I have encountered bullying at each place in my life that doesn’t mean it’s acceptable. Bullying is wrong. Don’t accept it as a part of life. It needs to be dealt with immediately.
2) Confront a bully. I researched this and didn’t like what I read. Nearly every article said ignore the bully, change your lifestyle to avoid attention from the bully. Well, I’m no psychologist, so you might want a second opinion here, but confronting the bully always worked for me. Involve your family, teachers, friends, coaches, and everyone you can, but confront the bully right away. Always stand up for what is right.
3) Don’t encourage a bully. If you are laughing along with a bully making fun of someone else, you’re a bully too. If you see bullying going on, and you do nothing to stop it, you’re part of the problem. You have a responsibility as a bystander. The bully wants your attention and thinks you approve if you do nothing. Repeat these words, “What you’re doing is wrong! Stop it! Don’t do it again or I will report it to someone who will do something about it.” Your behavior will be repeated by others. (Both the good, bad, and the indifferent.) We have all, at times, been guilty of taking a joke too far, and perhaps bullied someone. If so, we need to correct that mistake and make it right.
4) Invite everyone in on it. Don’t keep the bullying to yourself. Tell everyone you know what is going on. Kids! I’m talking to you now. You must let your parents know. Don’t keep it to yourself! It’s nothing to be ashamed about. The bully should be ashamed. If you tell someone and they do nothing about it, keep talking until someone does. Heck, email me, I’ll get involved.
5) Use the buddy system. Navy SEALS are the toughest warriors on the planet, but they don’t go into the water or anywhere without a buddy. Why? Because it’s dangerous. If you are being bullied take a friend. What if you don’t have a buddy? Make one. I knew a teacher that was being bullied by a parent. She went some places by herself and wanted the verbal abuse to stop. She carried a digital recorder with her. Once she played it back the bullying stopped. Surround yourself with positive people.
6) Bullying ends when confidence begins. If you really want bullying to end you must work on confidence. I don’t mean work on it a little bit; I mean work on it a lot! You can’t be bullied if you have confidence.
Confidence doesn’t allow you to second guess yourself. Confidence will encourage you to inform others about the problem. Confidence will give you the courage as a bystander to get involved. Confidence will help you in so many ways.
Is it Bullying?
We must use the word “bullying” with care. Misuse of the term bullying will undervalue the word and lessen the plight of its recipients.
Rude: When someone says or does something that is unintentionally hurtful they are being rude.
Mean: When someone says or does something intentionally hurtful, they are being mean.
Bullying: When someone says or does something that is intentionally hurtful and they keep repeating, even after you ask them to stop, that is bullying. But don’t wait until there are multiple occurrences. Help people when they are hurt and work to prevent future instances of harm.
Rudeness, meanness, and teasing can lead up to bullying and each needs to be addressed at some level.
Bullying quite often involves two or more people that aren’t friends, and there is often an imbalance of power. This imbalance of power can be a difference in size, popularity, holding a position of authority, or several children joining in to hurt another verbally, physically, or emotionally.
If you feel someone’s actions are harmful and intentional, intervene.
There are people in this world that are rude. They are called rude people.
There are people in this world that act like jerks. They are called jerks.
There are people in this world that are mean. They are called mean people.
But these people are not necessarily bullies.
Bullies are people that say or do something that is intentionally hurtful and they keep repeating it, even after you ask them to stop.
Bullying can take many forms including:
• Verbal bullying such as calling names and verbal harassment.
• Leaving another person out of a group.
• Physical bullying such as pushing, hitting, or kicking.
• Telling lies and spreading false rumors.
• Taking away things or damaging personal property.
• Threatening or forcing another person to do things they don’t want to do.
• Racial bullying.
• Sexual bullying.
• Religious bullying/persecution.
• Cyber-bullying (via smart-phone or computer).
This is just a small sample, but you can download the free, 20-page resource and share it with friends, right here:
In this newly updated edition I have focused lots of new content on dealing with the pressures and bullying on smartphones, social media and other forms of cyberbullying.
The opposite of a bully is a leader.
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