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Attitude: ‘The Flintstone Vitamin’ of Leadership


(Part 2 of 7 on Leadership)

A good attitude is the most important element in leadership. Period.

Even if you acquired and mastered all of the other qualities needed to be a successful leader, yet failed to develop a good attitude, you will fail as a leader. Furthermore, if you possessed only adequate measures of the other leadership traits, yet nurtured a fantastic attitude, you will excel as a leader.  Yes, your attitude is indeed that important!  To put it quite simply, your attitude will make you, or break you.

“Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.” ~ Winston Churchill

 

How can this be?  Well, a good attitude is the Flintstone vitamin of leadership; it automatically boosts all of the other leadership elements. A great attitude can compensate and even overcome a deficiency in another area.  If you are a poor communicator, for example,  that will hinder your ability to lead, but if your attitude is great, it will automatically boost your ability to communicate, and get you through some rough patches until you are able to strengthen your communication skills.

My mom always set out a Flintstone Vitamin for me in the morning. (I always wanted Dino. He seemed to have a lot of energy.)  I remember mom explaining to me the importance of taking the vitamin and how it would help me in Math class, and football practice, in art class, and even playing with my friends. I can’t help but to think of our attitudes acting in exactly the same way.  Whatever I am doing, a great attitude will make me even better at it.  Make sure you take your great attitude with you everywhere you go.

Imagine you had to work beside one of two people who were equally skilled, who would you choose to work with? Whom would you want to date of two equally attractive choices?  Perform dental work on you? And the list goes on.  The winner?  That’s easy. People with great attitudes!

Just like the Flintstone Vitamin, we can choose to take it or not.  It is our choice.  When poor circumstances or misfortune come our way we can choose to get negative and hot-headed, or place our thoughts on a new direction.

For years a banner hung in my classroom that read: Attitudes are contagious. Is yours worth catching? It was one of my favorite posters because it packed so much into one small saying. I learned right away as a teacher and coach that my students and athletes would mirror my attitude.  If I arrived with an enthusiastic spirit willing to learn, so would my students. If I was short tempered and impatient, well, they would mirror that as well.  It’s no surprise then in the work place or in sports that people mirror the attitudes of their leaders, whether they are the CEO or the team captain, the classroom teacher, or the parent.  Attitudes are mirrored.

Poems are a powerful way to illustrate a point with lot of emotion.  My brother mailed me the following poem to me when I played college football.  I guess he wanted me to be a positive role model and leader to his son, my nephew Zach, and other young men.

Little Eyes Upon You

There are little eyes upon you
and they’re watching night and day.
There are little ears that quickly
take in every word you say.

There are little hands all eager
to do anything you do;
And a little boy who’s dreaming
of the day he’ll be like you.

You’re the little fellow’s idol,
you’re the wisest of the wise.
In his little mind about you
no suspicions ever rise.

He believes in you devoutly,
holds all you say and do;
He will say and do, in your way
when he’s grown up just like you.

There’s a wide-eyed little fellow
who believes you’re always right;
and his eyes are always opened,
and he watches day and night.

You are setting an example
every day in all you do;
For the little boy who’s waiting
to grow up to be like you.

Time and time again I have thought back to that poem’s wisdom.  When we are in leadership positions people look up to us in many ways, and we must work hard to set a great example.  That example begins and ends with our attitude.

If you made a list of qualities that you did not admire and absolutely  didn’t want any part, they might closely resemble: laziness, stubbornness, bossiness, selfishness, snobbiness, etc.  And really, what are each of these, but nothing more than a poor attitude.  I tell you again, change your attitude and you will change your destiny.

The quality that we most admire in others has much to do with their attitude.

“Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, tha what other people think or say or do.  It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company, a church, or a home.  The remarkable thing is that we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day.”  Charles Swindoll

A Confession

One of my friends asked me why I was always so positive. The answer is simple and a very large part to my secret to what success I have achieved.  I see the world in a very unique way.  I view every person I meet, every person I contact, and anyone I come in contact with, as if they are the brightest, kindest, most helpful person I have ever met.  Furthermore, I truly believe it.  I believe that the people I meet absolutely wants to help me succeed and assist me.  You know what?  It almost always works out as I picture it too.

Have you heard about the Pygmalion Effect?  It comes from George Bernard Shaw’s story Pygmalion, better known probably as the movie My Fair Lady.  The Pygmalion Effect has been incorporated into school settings with teachers and students.  When teachers believe they have received the best students, or when students believe they have received the finest teachers, they respond accordingly and excel. (Even when it’s not true.)

I don’t apply this Pygmalion Effect for sheer personal gain.  I have always believe people should be measured on their best day, not their worst, and I know from personal experience that most people rise to the expectations they are held, so why not hold everyone to a high expectation.  Also, it fits with the Golden Rule; I would want people to expect the same from me on our first meeting.

Always forward,

Kelly

 

I am a professional speaker, and I would be honored to speak at your event!

Order Kelly’s books, Along Came a Leader and Unthink Before Bed: A Children’s Book on Mindfulness for your personal library.

Educator, Author, Keynote Speaker
Twitter: @kellycroy
Instagram: @kcroy
Website: kellycroy.com and wirededucator.com
Podcast: The Wired Educator Podcast
and of course: Facebook.

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Leadership: Six Areas of Focus

What is leadership?

I have seen men and women who have been elected, appointed, volunteered, and even thrust into leadership positions, that had no idea what they were supposed to do.  Some mistakenly thought their job was to boss everyone else around.  Others thought they were to change everything from the way the previous leader had it.  Still others thought a leader was the only person that should talk or make decisions. In an age that so desperately needs great leaders, it is sad to find so few, and with that realization, I share these six elements to help you grow as a leader.

A leader is someone that makes an impact in the lives of others and encourages them to make a positive difference in the world we live. A leader is a person who sets an example for others to follow and has the ability to influence others into action.  A leader does this by discovering the best in others and drawing it out of them, and guiding them to a greater life.

Leaders truly create an impact in the lives of others. They model the way things should be done so well that others wish to follow a similar path. Leaders know the dreams of the people around them and they help make those dreams obtainable; genuine appreciation and loyalty follow. Leaders hold everyone around them to a higher level, challenging them to become their best.

What makes a great leader?  Do you need to be elected to a high office, manage a Fortune 500 company, or lead a team to a world championship?  While those accomplishments may be excellent models of leaders, they may not always be able to verbalize the qualities of great leaders. No, the requirements and qualifications of a leader are woven into the lives of everyone that aspires to bring out the best in others. Leaders are found in the parents who raise great children, teachers that inspire students to become contributing members of society, and everywhere we find someone willing to make a difference.

Here are the six areas to focus on to become a better leader:

1) Attitude: A good attitude is the most important element in leadership. Period.

2) Wisdom: there is a difference between intelligence and wisdom. Possessing both are ideal, but the latter is the king of leadership.

3) Tenacity: Be a contender.  Enjoy the thrill of a challenge and competition.

4) Communication: Become a master communicator.

5) Vision: Promote a vision that others willfully seek.

6) Authenticity: Living an authentic life is paramount to maintaining your credibility as a leader and leaving a lasting impact on others.

My next six posts will look at each area in greater detail.

~Kelly

Kelly is an inspirational speaker, author, and artist. Please visit our website to book Kelly for your next event. www.kellycroy.com info@kellycroy.com 1-800-831-4825

Kelly Croy is a chalk artist and professional speaker. His presentations have entertained and amazed audiences across the nation including corporations, schools, churches, conferences, and numerous other venues where people come together to be entertained and improve their lives. Please consider booking Kelly for your next event.


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The Little Things…

I recently journaled a list of the most influential people from my past and present. I attempted to record how their life has impacted mine and what I learned from each. While there were a few common denominators, one really stood out amongst them all; each taught me that the little things in life matter.

It seems each influential person in my life attempted, in his or her own way, to encourage me to take care of the small matters because they add up and make big changes in our lives. My parents, teachers, coaches, and mentors all stressed this principle and I couldn’t be more thankful. I have found that much of my success in life is due to this very simple truth.

Now, as a coach, teacher, father, and speaker, I pass along this valued lesson. On the football field we stressed the importance of each and every step and motion of the body to running a play successfully. The athletes had to actually complete a stop-motion series of steps, and they had to call them out as they progressed. In the classroom, the successful student is the one who takes care of the small matters in an assignment or project. At home I have taught my daughters to take care of problems before they get a chance to grow. Even in my relationships, the greatest affection and interest has always come from the small matters of thank-you notes, phone calls, and small pleasantries.

Truly, taking care of the small things in life has much to do with compassion and discipline. Be compassionate enough to allow the small things to matter and be disciplined enough to see them through. The good habits of exercise, saving money, prayer, reading, and eating healthy begin with the very smallest of beginnings.

Years ago I read a great book by legendary basketball coach John Wooden. In the book, Coach Wooden explains how his first lesson for his top NCAA basketball recruits (each of whom was recruited by countless schools, and each having played basketball incredibly well since they could run) was to teach them the proper way to tie their shoe. Yes, tie their shoes! Coach Wooden knew a shoe could and would come untied during a big game, at a crucial time, and that single factor could decide the outcome. It’s the little things that truly matter most.

One of my favorite movies, The Shawshank Redemption, focuses heavily on this theme. Tim Robbins plays the part of Andy, a wrongly imprisoned man who impacts the lives of everyone at The Shawshank Prison through his small, yet consistent actions. Andy makes some amazing accomplishments and an incredible escape simply by focusing and mastering the smallest of details. Watch it.

Let us be reminded that the smallest of snow flakes that land on the mountain top combine with others building layer upon layer, melting and moving downward to become some of the most powerful rivers on the planet. These rivers carve their way through stone, and over time they leave their lasting impression on our planet. Small things really do add up. Little things really do matter.

As we give thanks this month for our many blessings, let us focus on some of the small details that we have been overlooking. Let’ give these small matters the attention they deserve and wait and see if they do not in fact lead to an amazing change in ourselves.

One of Mother Teresa wisest lessons, “In this life we cannot do great things. We can only do small things with great love.”

What are some of the little things in our lives that need greater attention?

What small thing can you begin today that will make a difference over time.?

~Kelly

Kelly is an inspirational speaker, author, and artist. Please visit our website to book Kelly for your next event. www.kellycroy.com info@kellycroy.com 1-800-831-4825

Kelly Croy is a chalk artist and professional speaker. His presentations have entertained and amazed audiences across the nation including corporations, schools, churches, conferences, and numerous other venues where people come together to be entertained and improve their lives. Please consider booking Kelly for your next event.

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You Win in the Fourth: and I’m Not Just Talking Football!

Nagurski_Bronko_strong_football_playerYou Win In The Fourth!

Any coach will tell you that all games are won and lost in the fourth quarter. Just think how many teams have even come back in the final seconds of the game to win it!

Finishing strong is an ingredient for any successful team and any successful person. As we enter the fourth quarter of 2009 I implore you to reflect on your resolutions and goals that you set way back in January and finish this year with determination and a sense of accomplishment. If you didn’t set any goals, well don’t fret, even now is a great time to get started.

Finishing strong is all about attitude. The fourth quarter is the most challenging because you are physically exhausted and emotionally drained.  You must summon an inner, unknown reserve and push yourself beyond the distractions and obstacles that would normally slow you down.

The next three months will be filled with many events and holidays.  Many will use these events as opportunities to create excuses about why they are not following through on some accomplishments and goals. Don’t let that happen to you! Use these events as opportunities to measure your progress as you work toward the goal. You can reach it, but even if you don’t, you are so much better off for having made progress.  Extend the resolution, don’t quit it,  and you will be even closer to accomplishing it the following year.  Too many have one minor setback and then discard the entire project.  Success is a series of attempts and failures until eventually, the goal is accomplished.  Just like football.

Finish Strong because you win in the fourth.  End 2009 with as much hope and possibility as you started it.


~ Kelly


Kelly is an inspirational speaker, author, and artist. Please visit our website to book Kelly for your next event. www.kellycroy.com info@kellycroy.com 1-800-831-4825

Kelly Croy is a chalk artist and professional speaker. His presentations have entertained and amazed audiences across the nation including corporations, schools, churches, conferences, and numerous other venues where people come together to be entertained and improve their lives.  Please consider booking Kelly for your next event.

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Amazing Video: Makes Me Want to be a Better Person! (A Better Father.)

I ran across this video the other day and it made the hair on the back of my neck stand up, and my eyes water.  After watching only a few minutes I found myself wanting to give more of myself, accomplish more, make a greater impact, and of course, be a better father.  This video is beyond inspirational. It will change your view on life.  Please watch it and share it.

Make your day great!

~ Kelly

Kelly is an inspirational speaker, author, and artist. Please visit our website to book Kelly for your next event. www.kellycroy.com info@kellycroy.com 1-800-831-4825

Kelly Croy is a chalk artist and professional speaker. His presentations have entertained and amazed audiences across the nation including corporations, schools, churches, conferences, and numerous other venues where people come together to be entertained and improve their lives.  Please consider booking Kelly for your next event.

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Love, Loyalty, Friendship & The Irish Claddagh

“With my two hands I give you my heart, and crown it with my love.”

One of the first gifts I gave my wife, Lorrain Croy, was an Irish Claddagh Ring.  She appreciated the gift, and its story has served as the foundation for our marriage.

We dated for six years before getting married, and I just recently calculated I have now known my wife longer than I haven’t known her.  The years have certainly gone by quickly, especially now with our four children.  Fourteen years doesn’t seem like an incredible milestone in itself, but considering the average marriage in the United States only lasts eight years and approximately fifty percent of all marriages fail, I guess we are doing well.  I don’t know the reasons behind those figures, however, I do know some couples go into their marriage with a Plan B.  The Plan B resembles something like, “if things get too tough, or don’t work out, we’ll just quit and start over.” Lori and I did not go into our marriage with a Plan B, but if we had, it would more closely resemble a duel: ten paces, turn fire, winner take all.  I’m joking of course. Please don’t enter into a relationship with a Plan B.

The Claddagh ring is a gold ring with a crown, and two hands holding a heart. I gave it to her when we were dating, and I wear a Claddagh as my wedding band.  The crown represents Loyalty, the heart  represents Love, and the hands represents Friendship; the three greatest qualities for a lasting marriage. My cousin Michael retold me the Irish legend behind the Claddagh as we visited with him on our honeymoon in Ireland:

A king near Galway Ireland had found the love of his life. He wanted to profess his love for her in a unique and powerful way.  He summoned his wisest advisors and counselors and asked them what were the most important qualities for a long lasting marriage.  He thought if he could learn this, then he would be with his wife for his entire life.  After much thought and consideration, the king’s counselors returned with their answer: love, loyalty, and friendship were the three most important qualities to a marriage.

Without hesitation, the king summoned his most favored artisan and jeweler and asked that a golden ring be designed at once to represent these qualities.  The jeweler created the first Claddagh ring and presented it to the king.  He proposed and married his love at once.  His wedding band served as a reminder to him for what he should strive for in his marriage.  The design of the ring became popular and the ring of choice for all couples in his kingdon and eventually all of Ireland.

Lori is my best friend, and I love her with all my heart. While our marriage is not without disagreements and passionate discussions, we truly live by the qualities represented in the Claddagh and work with each other to always give our best to each other and our four children.

I am thankful to all of the wonderful marriages that have served as positive role models to me from my family to my friends. I continue to learn about being a better husband by observing some phenomenal couples working together through tough times.

I once heard someone say, “To have a great marriage you first must find the right person, and then be the right person.”  My Claddagh helps me to work at being the right person; I know I have already found the right one.

~ Kelly

Kelly is an inspirational speaker, author, and artist.

Please visit our website to book Kelly for your next event. www.kellycroy.com info@kellycroy.com 1-800-831-4825

Kelly Croy is a chalk artist and professional speaker. His presentations have entertained and amazed audiences across the nation including corporations, schools, churches, conferences, and numerous other venues where people come together to be entertained and improve their lives.  Please consider booking Kelly for your next event.

Lorrain Croy  Lori magistrate attorney lawyer ottawa county 

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Find Your Kryptonite!

kryptoniteOur culture and history have provided us with some amazing heroes whose lessons serve to entertain, inspire, teach, and empower. Greek Mythology, the Bible, and even modern comics tell similar tales of heroes whose fate is determined by a single weakness.

The Greek hero Achilles was dipped into the fiery waters of the River Styx to make his skin impervious to any weapon in preparation for the Trojan War. His mother, a goddess, held onto his ankles while immersing him, and as a result his skin was untouched and unprotected where he was held. His enemies learned of his single weakness and volleys of arrows were launched at his ankles. Achilles was killed. Today we call a single point of vulnerability our Achilles Heel.

The Biblical story of Samson’s strength is chronicled  in the Book of Judges. Samson was able to wrestle a lion, destroy an entire army with the jawbone of an ass, and he even destroyed a temple of colossal size and structure. Samson too had but one weakness, his hair. Samson’s girlfriend, Delilah, was bribed to uncover this weakness. After learning of it, she cut off his hair.  He was weakened, blinded, and imprisoned.

Superman, arguably one of the best known heroes in modern culture, could fly, possessed enormous strength, had x-ray vision, shot heat-beams from his eyes, and bullets literally bounced off his skin. Superman, however, also had one weakness; kryptonite, a chunk of his home planet.  When Superman came near the substance he would drop to his knees and become helpless.

Perhaps you are like me and your weakness is more likely procrastination than a meteorite from an alien world, a third piece of apple pie than an enemy’s arrow, or an over-reaction than a monumental loss of strength from a bad haircut. Still, it is to our advantage and surely our responsibility to know what our weaknesses are and to guard against them.

We simply must take inventory of our weaknesses if we are to improve ourselves.  Sadly, there are many that find little or no fault with their lives, and are one day suddenly blindsided. They are content by comparing themselves with only those who have worse faults. You can exercise for hours each day, but  you won’t see results until you overcome your desire to eat an entire chocolate cake for breakfast every morning. With self improvement comes self discipline, and another great benefit is, as we focus on improvement in one area, we gradually improve in several.

So, do you know your weakness? If not, how can you and your loved ones protect you from them? Each year I undergo a complete physical to protect myself from illness.  I do it as much for my family as I do for myself.  Shouldn’t we do the same for all of the important areas in our lives?  Stand guard to attacks on your physical self, emotional self, financial self, spiritual self, and any area of your life that is important to you by simply identifying a danger.

We have seen so many fall from grace in Hollywood and in politics.  We wonder how people can make such blunders, but realize they are caught up in their own self worth and success.  They think they are unstoppable. They become arrogant.  They are careless. The Greeks called this Hubris.

We may not be heroes of paramount proportion, but we do have people counting on us and responsibilities to maintain. We must know our faults and weaknesses and work at improving upon them.  We must hold ourselves accountable, share with a trusted accountability partner, and keep ourselves from those very temptations.

A steel worker knows his greatest vulnerability is a fall from a great height.  He protects himself with a cable and harness, and works closely with coworkers to keep safety a top priority.  During my eighteen years as a football coach we watched countless hours of film to not only learn of our opponents weaknesses, but our own. It is time to for you to take similar actions and reflection.

Let’s take a quick inventory of some possible dangers that might be affecting key areas of your life just to get you started in the process: Are there actions you take at work that could endanger your job? Are there activities in your life keeping you away from loved ones? Do you indulge in certain foods or drinks that are hurting you physically? Is there an attack on your emotions that you need to confront?  Are there people you need to avoid? Substances that bring out the worst in you?  Are there places you visit that make you a less than ideal individual? Do you have an accountability partner that you can trust and bounce ideas off to help you improve? You get the idea. Maybe these could be added to your journal or discussed in private. Regardless, they make a great starting point.

Once you discover your vulnerabilities you will immediately start developing a plan of protection and escape.  It is human nature.

Fear not!  Your friends and family are the ones who bring out the best in you, and they’ll be there when you falter, as you will for them.  The greater the problem, the greater the hero, so if your weakness is great, then so will you be by overcoming it.

Make Your Day Great, Find your Kryptonite!

~ Kelly

Kelly is an inspirational speaker, author, and artist. Please visit our website to book Kelly for your next event. www.kellycroy.com info@kellycroy.com 1-800-831-4825

Kelly Croy is a chalk artist and professional speaker. His presentations have entertained and amazed audiences across the nation including corporations, schools, churches, conferences, and numerous other venues where people come together to be entertained and improve their lives.  Please consider booking Kelly for your next event.

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Make Your Day Great: Six Easy Steps for Making the Most of Today

Picture 4A few years ago I started ending much of my correspondence with the closing,  ‘Make Your Day Great’ and it has become somewhat of a  motto.  While most people say, “Have a great day,” I place the responsibility onto the person I’m writing. Having a great day and making a day great are not the same.

When someone tells me to have a great day, I think, “Sure, that would be nice,” and I wait for something to happen.  I’ve even heard people reply to this with, “Yeah, right!” They just don’t see themselves winning the lucky, great-day lottery.

Telling someone to make their day great offers them a challenge and a choice. Sure, we might happen upon a great day.  Things like that do happen, but then again we might also stumble  upon a crappy day just as likely.  Being challenged to make the day great offers a choice.

So how do we do it?  How do we go about making our day great?

First of all, get the right attitude.  Slap a silly smile on your mug, and believe that you can make your day great, because, yep, you guessed it, you really can.  You are in control.  You cannot control what happens. (I totally agree with this!) But you can control how you react to it.  If your four-year-old pours milk on the shirt you just ironed you can freak out or laugh.  (We’d certainly laugh if it happened to someone else.) It’s a choice.  You can choose a first-rate attitude and domino that into a great day, or a second-rate attitude (or worse) and spiral down to a bad day. Heck, laughing about what happened and retelling the story with a great attitude will make you the hit of the office.  It will impact everyone.

Second, make a plan.  Ask yourself what it would really take to have a great day.  Would you like to exercise? Complete some chores? Talk with someone you miss? Spend time with a family member?  Write it down and build it into your day, that way it actually happens.  Journals and index cards are awesome places to plan your day. Plan your day or someone else will.  And while you’re at it, plan some fun into your day.

Third, keep it simple.  Our best days in life are usually very simple ones.  Spending time either doing things that make us feel a sense of accomplishment or enjoyment rank high, but more importantly it’s who we spend our day with that matters the most. Don’t over do it. Do things that make you feel good in the short and long term.  For instance, exercise and lots of water makes me feel good immediately and over time.  A candy bar makes me feel instantly good, but bad later.  Do the former, lose the latter. Finding some private time to write, to pray, to listen to some of my favorite tunes revitalizes my outlook on the day.

Next, assume the best of others.  Avoid gossip and speculation.  Assume that others always mean well.  If someone crosses you or is rude, assume it was accidental and move on.  Don’t make it personal.  Besides, and this is a hard one for me, you can’t control what others think or say.  You really can’t.  Since you can’t, don’t let it bum you out.  Give your best and move forward.  Stay positive.

Furthermore, compare your day with others, but be careful. To have a great day you have to do great things.  Without becoming envious or jealous, whose day do you admire?  Being careful, use them as a model.  On the other hand, if you think you are having a bad day you might consider comparing yourself to those less fortunate.  (Having trouble? Pick up a newspaper.  If you don’t see them on the front page, flip to the obituaries.)

Last, start your day with gratitude and fill it with service. Openly give thanks for all that you have.  Make time in your day to serve others. See someone having a bad day? Flash them a smile and do something unexpectedly nice.  These actions alone will truly make your day a great one.

I have recently received emails from some friends letting me know that they too are now using the closing Make Your Day Great, and I give them my complete approval, just as long as they live it. Once you do it, it becomes contagious.

Make Your Day Great!

~ Kelly

Kelly is an inspirational speaker, author, and artist. Please visit our website to book Kelly for your next event. www.kellycroy.com info@kellycroy.com 1-800-831-4825

Kelly Croy is a chalk artist and professional speaker. His presentations have entertained and amazed audiences across the nation including corporations, schools, churches, conferences, and numerous other venues where people come together to be entertained and improve their lives.  Please consider booking Kelly for your next event.