We live in a time when frustration and overwhelm are not only rampant, but they are accepted as normal feelings and talked about as a badge of honor, or as evidence of being a hard worker.
Q: “How’s it going today?”
A: “I am so busy! It’s crazy. I am completely overwhelmed with the number of emails and work. I’m not sure if I’ll ever get in front of it. Same thing at home. I have to be so many places tonight.”
Isn’t the above accepted as normal banter?
Listen, frustration and overwhelm are not okay.
How we talk to ourselves matters. How we talk about ourselves matters. We must be intentional with how we speak about ourselves, our jobs, and our lives.
Frustration and overwhelm will not end by executing an enormous number of hours of work. Frustration and overwhelm will end when we interrupt how we are thinking, change the way we talk about work and life, and change what we take action on and prioritize.
Our brains are taking in a tremendous amount of messages from television, social media, interactions with others, main stream media and a variety of other sources. A good portion of these messages are manipulated in ways that create an inaccurate baseline of self value. Likes, followers, shares, filtered photos, editing apps, and other variables enhance a false narrative of normal. It would appear as if everyone is fit, always looks great, has more money, buys nicer cars, travels to exotic places, and is always happy. A part of us knows the reality that this isn’t really the case, but there it is in front of us again and again, like waves on a beach beating down on us.
Too many people, young and old, are feeling Not Good Enough.
How can we put An End to Not Feeling Good Enough?
- We need to limit our social media consumption.
- Interrupt what we focus on. Get an understanding that almost none of it is real or matters anyway.
- Change how we talk to ourselves. Journal some positive things to plant in your mind. Create a running list of positives to focus on in certain situations and especially before bed.
- Get our bodies moving. Especially when we are feeling beat down.
- Build a network of friends that include a truth teller, an encourager, a coach, and a friend. Be these for others too.
- Control what we are putting into us. That includes foods, music, books, drinks, thoughts, drugs, media, stories, and more.
- Change the story we tell about ourselves. Both at work and at home! Focus on what you are accomplishing and the positives of your day. Don’t exaggerate. They are there!
- Make gratitude a regular part of your self talk and outward talk. Make a list. Read it.
- Say “not right now” to new tasks and responsibilities and until you really have time for them.
- Make a list of what makes you feel good and what doesn’t. Schedule more of the former.
- Embrace mindfulness. Take a minute to stop what you are doing. Smile. Breathe. Limit your thoughts.
I don’t want others to feel not good enough. I don’t want to feel that way. I don’t want my family to feel that way. I don’t want you to feel that way. It’s not going to happen accidentally; we must start being intentional about it. Catch yourself talking outwardly or inwardly in negative ways and correct it immediately with a new version; that is habit interrupting and rebuilding. Catch yourself feeling negatively and immediately change what you are thinking about, and if you can, what you are doing and where you are at. Get in front of this and change your life.
I look forward to your thoughts and questions in the comment section below.
Kelly
PS. Season 2 of The Future Focused Podcast will start in a few days. I hope you will subscribe and listen.
Looking for a dynamic speaker for your event? • Kelly Croy is an author, speaker and educator. Want to learn more? Send me an email. • Sign-up for Kelly’s Newsletter. Listen to Kelly’s other podcast The Wired Educator Podcast with over 121 episodes of interviews and professional development. • Order Kelly’s book, Along Came a Leader for your personal library. • Follow Kelly Croy on Facebook. • Follow Kelly Croy on Twitter. • Follow Kelly Croy on Instagram